December 2nd, 2015
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adele_hello_remixbattle

The concept behind Adele’s comeback track “Hello” stands in stark opposition to all the well-meaning advice our friends have given us regarding our exes: don’t talk to them.

Well, it’s a good thing Adele ignored this, because A) the track is a banger (no, that word isn’t losing its meaning, what are you talking about?) and B) it means the inevitable barrage of remixes that assault popular songs have come. Like the wallflower who suddenly comes into herself post-puberty and suddenly has really knocking knockers, “Hello” finds itself as the object of everyone’s affection.

But, out of the veritable galaxy of “Hello” remixes currently swirling around the 1 and 0 ethers of the Google, there are two that are really a lot better than the other ones.

And you bet your ass we’re going to pit them against each other in this edition of Remix Battle.

 

**A previous version of this post pitted Paul Damixie against Marshmello but that version of the song has been pulled off Soundcloud :(

#1: “Hello” Slander Remix

In the red corner, we have Slander, an electronic duo best known for hard-hitting trap rhythms taking on a track one might not expect to melt face. Uplifting beats instantly transport you to your happy place before slow, melancholy piano takes over accompanied by Adele’s perfect, make-an-angel-cry voice. Before long, however, everything that makes Slander, well, Slander comes all at once — rapid drum kicks rattle the song, shifting the mood to something distinctly more dance-able. It moves faster and faster until the drop, where “Hello”‘s signature emotion-inducing nostalgia remains, only this time pushed to a place defined by joy rather than sorrow, in part because the tempo is sped up to a point where weeping uncontrollably just doesn’t seem appropriate.

#2: “Hello” Paul Damixie Remix

Next up on the blue corner, we have Paul Damixie‘s much less faithful, but no less groovy remix. Bubbly house music ensnares right from the start, refusing to let go until you start dancing to the song. The music softens when Adele’s powerful vocals come in, before rising back up with a vengeance as the singer begins her hook and on through the chorus. A slight tropical influence hangs around the chorus before receding ever so slightly during the second verse, but by now you’re a hostage to the music, unable to stop yourself as you fist-pump to a fucking Adele song.

Fight for your favorite’s supremacy in Remix Battle’s latest head-to-head. Or, y’know, just cast your vote.