For a long time, I would kind of wince whenever someone called me a “girly-girl”- which is absurd because I’m a woman who has long hair, loves pink, and wears dresses most of time. Although I loved things that were conventionally “feminine”, I hated the baggage that came with that classification. In my mind, to be feminine meant to be weak. This internalized misogyny manifested itself in other sinister ways in my life. There was a time when I was only friends with males, because I was distrustful of an entire gender as being “catty”, “jealous”, and nothing but “drama”. I’m so glad I got over these ludicrous learned stereotypes because most of my friends are women now and our friendships are the most supporting and fulfilling relationships I’ve had in my life.
Another thing that angers me is that the few times women are celebrated in society is when they are able to be tough, firm, bold – essentially, when they act like “men” and can achieve the same things that “men” value in society. Fuck that. This, week I want to celebrate vulnerability, softness, and pushing femininity to the point of being extreme and harsh. This by no means is excluded to biological women, though. I think the terms “feminine” and “masculine” should be changed to something that doesn’t inherently further the idea that a particular set of traits are exclusive to a particular sex – but that’s a conversation for another time.
1. Jellywolf by Alma Har’el ft. Kiersey Clemons and Lisa Bonet:
2. Arca – “Anoche”:
3. Jay Som – “Baybee”:
4. STRFKR – “In The End”:
5. A Guide to Indulgence by Nadia Lee Cohen (NSFW):
6. Homeshake – “Every Single Thing”:
7. HEALTH – “Euphoria”: